When it comes to sexting, you really do make your own rules. It’s critical to be safe, but all in all, just use common sense. This article is for people who have decided that they do want to sext. So, if you’re that person who chooses to do it, at least understand the purpose of sexting to begin with: to turn the receiver aka your crush or partner/spouse ON through visual and mental stimulation with those sexts. This article is written more with men in mind, but women can gain value from reading it as well. Below are some things I feel are very wise to keep in mind when sending those very flirtatious and often kinky messages.
1: Know who you are sexting and I mean, be very selective about who you are sexting.
Know the intention behind the relationship. Is this a person you potentially see a relationship happening with? Is it your long-term girlfriend/boyfriend? It is someone you’ve just been on 2-3 dates with so far?
Sexting is most appropriate when it’s done with someone you’re seriously involved with and where that trust factor is present. Remember these are your private body parts and frequently your dirtiest thoughts (what a private thing!), so you want to know that the recipient has the type of character who will accept it and not forward it on; Note to men: It’s not the greatest idea to send sexts as jokes or too early on in getting to know someone, women, very frequently will be turned OFF by this and feel that you’re in it for all the wrong reasons, even if you are not.
2: Don’t sex text with someone unless you’ve met the person first.
You are setting yourself up for failure and disappointment if you do this, and you do NOT want to end up in a catfishing scenario. It’s just plain unsafe. Plus it’s not so sexy to show that you’re willing to give up such dirty things so soon, makes you look like you don’t have much standards for yourself, especially on the nude-side-of-things… most women will assume this is desperate behaviour. And ladies, men will see this as you being easy.
3: Never show your face or anything that shows it to be distinctively YOU in a dirty photo!
Your face is a dead give-away of YOU, as is a specific tattoo, piercing, or birth mark. Yes that person knows it was you who sent it, but you truly don’t want the whole world to see that one day (should that happen, and it does happen!)… Stay away from the distinctive-ness, you never know how that relationship will end up and it is WAY too easy to upload stuff to social media these days…someone can use that as blackmail if things go sour between the two of you. People change man. People expose people and what’s worse than a sext threat?
4: Easy on the nudes!
Not all women are visual, most are psychological; most women do not operate the same as men do so often a sexy comment will just do the trick, certain nudes may give the woman a wrong impression as mentioned before (yes many women do not love the penis pictures, a lot even feel the ab shots are played out too).
It depends on what the relationship is between you two and the type of woman you are dealing with, but generally speaking, to turn a woman on, stimulate her mentally, then she will be so much more inclined to open up to you or trust to “sext” back with you. Keep it tasteful. For example, describing the way the experience with her made you feel or what you are tempted to do to her next time, or what it is about her that you miss. Total turn on.
5: Grammar-check please!
Oh my gosh. Super UN-attractive to receive a sexy text from someone who can’t even formulate a proper sentence.
I mean, come on! You can position your abs nicely for a photo in your boxers with the nice love trail showing in perfect lighting, yet you text the following, “I no your missing this right now”
Not-anymore! It’s ‘know’ and ‘you’re’ – gosh, go back to school. Huge turn-off, makes one seem immature when you don’t know basis English spelling and grammar.
6: Use privacy settings on your phone!
If you are a sexter, make sure you have a password-protected phone so that one day a family member or someone innocent does not pick it up, scroll through and see… well, what they shouldn’t. Often we leave our phones out, and if you have the type of phone where messages just pop up and people can see what the incoming messages say, you may want to consider changing those phone privacy options for obvious reasons. Thank me later.